There was a nurse laughing and asking why his hair was so long, and Leo answering, “Because promises grow slow.” There was a video from just three weeks earlier of Lily lying on the couch, running her fingers through one of his curls and whispering, “Don’t cut it yet.
It still helps.”
By the time I finished editing, I couldn’t see the screen through my tears.
Sunday evening, we drove to Brenda’s house under a pink-gray sky that made everything look softer than it was.
Mark had the laptop bag at his feet and a large manila envelope tucked under his arm.
I knew better than to ask what was inside.
Whatever it was, he had prepared it with the same terrifying calm he’d worn since Thursday.
Brenda opened the door in a pressed blouse and lipstick, smelling like perfume and rosemary.
The dining room table was already set for the whole family.
Her roast beef sat on the counter, filling the house with the kind of comforting smell that usually means safety.
That night it just made me nauseous.
She leaned down to kiss Lily’s head, then looked at Leo and smiled with ugly satisfaction.
“There,” she said.
“Isn’t that much neater?”
Leo moved behind Mark so fast it barely looked conscious.
Mark put a hand back without turning around and rested it against Leo’s leg.
“We’re not doing that tonight, Mom,” he said.
Brenda’s husband, Tom, looked between all of us with the shell-shocked expression of a man who knew something was wrong but not how wrong.
Mark’s sister Dana was there too, along with her teenage daughter.
Nobody seemed to understand why the air in the room felt so thin.
Brenda kept talking anyway, bright and brisk, as if she could manage reality by keeping the conversation moving.
