Every time I got angry, Kyle told me to cultivate a sense of humor. His brothers called me difficult, and his mother said that I should be grateful to belong to such a cheerful family.
Sitting in the desert, I admitted the truth.
I hated how I was treated.
The most painful thing was that I hated the person I had become when I tried to please them.
Then I remembered that Kyle had borrowed an old phone that morning and kept it in my jacket pocket. It had almost no battery, but a message appeared before the screen went off.
Don’t be angry. It’s just a channel joke. We’ll be back later. Quiet.
His brothers had a channel of online jokes and longed to become famous. Kyle wanted his approval so much that he turned his wife into a show.
I made my decision before the phone went out completely.
I wouldn’t expect them.
I’d disappear.
A van entered the station. A tired woman came down while two children were arguing in the back seat. I approached with caution.
“Excuse me. Do you travel north?”
He looked at me with concern.
“I can take you to the state border. Are you in danger?”
“I need to get out of here.”
Her name was Marcy. He let me travel with her for four hours without asking me for explanations. At one stop, he bought me water and a sandwich. Before I left at the bus station, he gave me ten dollars and a charger for the mobile.
“Whatever you leave behind,” he said, “don’t come back simply because being alone scares you. I stayed too long once.”
“You saved me today.”
Marcy gave me a tired smile.
“No. You saved yourself. I just took you.”
Inside the station, I borrowed the phone long enough to email my mother’s sister, Aunt May. I hadn’t spoken to her in three years because Kyle had convinced me she was controlling.
Can I stay with you? I have nowhere to go.
His response came almost immediately.
The key is under the doormat. You can always go home.
I bought a one-way bus ticket with Marcy’s money, destroyed the SIM card on the phone and threw it in the trash.
Fourteen hours later, I arrived at Aunt May’s small coastal town at dawn. She was waiting for me next to an old blue van, with her silver hair gathered in a braid.
When he saw me get off the bus without luggage, he didn’t ask me questions. He just surrounded me with his arms.
“I’ll take you home.”
I slept for almost two days.
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